It all started so simply - in mid-January I strained my bad knee. Then came the cortisone shot that didn't do a thing except, perhaps, give me the staph infection that settled in. That was followed, a few days later, by emergency surgery when doctors realized the infection was causing a heart murmur. A second surgery, 2 days later, further drained the knee. Today, almost a month later, I go to my local hospital for a daily infusion of antibiotics. Next week an MRI and then I hope both the infectious disease doctor and the surgeon will sign off and I can start PT. You see, I can no longer walk - I haven't walked since mid- January. It was easy to learn how to do it 65 years ago so why can't I do it now?
That is why there has been such a long silence. I am still on meds, but less than before, so I think I can now sit down and write - and the words may actually form sentences that make sense. I also honor and appreciate the people I dearly love who are facing far greater challenges than mine. You keep me balanced.
What have I learned from all this?
1. I now better understand those old novels and movies where men fell in love with their nurses. Nurses are the most wonderful people on earth. Bar none. I have dealt with 6 doctors, each countering what previous ones said, often abrupt, leaving me somewhat confused - but not the nurses. I am comforted and nurtured by them. I never leave without fully understanding what is going on. They answer questions I barely knew I had. I have been in 3 different hospitals for different procedures and each and every nurse has kept me going. Then, add the incredible gift that Lee and Michelle gave by visiting two weeks ago. Nurse Michelle made sure everything was done; she stayed with me through procedures; she kept me sane. So, nurses are the absolute best. Go hug a nurse - they are WONDERFUL!
2. I now know I made the right decision to move to this retirement community. At Christmas, when I was reflecting about how much goodness is in my life, I recognized that yes, my impetuous decision of Feb 2013 was correct. I am really, really happy living here. It has, in fact, surpassed my expectations. Then, along came this mess and it has solidified these thoughts. The help I have received over the past 6 weeks is amazing. Friends stop by to ask what I need and it appears; I can hire a driver to take me to appointments if family or friends aren't available; interesting books appear at my door to borrow as long as I want; and my little unit ends up being perfect for swinging, via wheelchair, from bookcase to bureau, to wall, to bed - as I get things done.
I do not know what I would have done if I were still living in my duplex. That bathroom was so narrow I could not have gotten my wheelchair into it. That would have become interesting! Given the very cold weather we have had - well, I would have frozen in that poorly heated unit. And it had lots of stairs - up to my office, down to the laundry in the basement, outside to get to my car. Although my precious family says they would have figured it all out - it would have been at a price of great stress to all. Here I have been able to do almost everything myself. Way to go, Donna!
3. My gratitude for drugs. My knee hurts and, when it starts to act up, I know I can pop a pill and it will soon be manageable - thank you, thank you, thank you. I am aware of addiction issues and won't let that happen - but in the meantime, thank you!
4. Now here is the big one - given that I made the right choice to move to this retirement community, there is no longer any reason to keep my very precious, sweet little cottage in Pacific Grove. At Christmas I decided to sell it and planned to go down and spend the month of February getting it ready for the market. Instead, the night before my flight, I was rushed to that emergency surgery. So what to do? My tenants had moved out, painters and floor refinishers were lined up, I was ready to go - just unable to get there.
If you had told me that I would allow my sweet house to go on the market without one more visit, I would have laughed. Utterly impossible. Actually, quite possible. Pain and fatigue have focused me on what is truly important. But I also have a secret weapon - I have the very best friend in the world who lives next door to me in Pacific Grove and happens to also be a top-rated realtor. Wonderful Robin has stepped in and handled everything for me. Via email and phone calls we are choosing paint colors, floor stains, and landscaping details. When the bug report and house inspection came back we analyzed what needed to be done. And given the cost of all the decisions we are making, I am really glad that one of us is not on drugs! Thank you, Robin. I still hope that I will get to visit before it sells but, if not, it will all be okay.
So I am on the mend; I firmly believe that I will walk again; and, am okay about letting go of my sweet little house. Truly onwards and upwards.
That is why there has been such a long silence. I am still on meds, but less than before, so I think I can now sit down and write - and the words may actually form sentences that make sense. I also honor and appreciate the people I dearly love who are facing far greater challenges than mine. You keep me balanced.
What have I learned from all this?
1. I now better understand those old novels and movies where men fell in love with their nurses. Nurses are the most wonderful people on earth. Bar none. I have dealt with 6 doctors, each countering what previous ones said, often abrupt, leaving me somewhat confused - but not the nurses. I am comforted and nurtured by them. I never leave without fully understanding what is going on. They answer questions I barely knew I had. I have been in 3 different hospitals for different procedures and each and every nurse has kept me going. Then, add the incredible gift that Lee and Michelle gave by visiting two weeks ago. Nurse Michelle made sure everything was done; she stayed with me through procedures; she kept me sane. So, nurses are the absolute best. Go hug a nurse - they are WONDERFUL!
2. I now know I made the right decision to move to this retirement community. At Christmas, when I was reflecting about how much goodness is in my life, I recognized that yes, my impetuous decision of Feb 2013 was correct. I am really, really happy living here. It has, in fact, surpassed my expectations. Then, along came this mess and it has solidified these thoughts. The help I have received over the past 6 weeks is amazing. Friends stop by to ask what I need and it appears; I can hire a driver to take me to appointments if family or friends aren't available; interesting books appear at my door to borrow as long as I want; and my little unit ends up being perfect for swinging, via wheelchair, from bookcase to bureau, to wall, to bed - as I get things done.
I do not know what I would have done if I were still living in my duplex. That bathroom was so narrow I could not have gotten my wheelchair into it. That would have become interesting! Given the very cold weather we have had - well, I would have frozen in that poorly heated unit. And it had lots of stairs - up to my office, down to the laundry in the basement, outside to get to my car. Although my precious family says they would have figured it all out - it would have been at a price of great stress to all. Here I have been able to do almost everything myself. Way to go, Donna!
3. My gratitude for drugs. My knee hurts and, when it starts to act up, I know I can pop a pill and it will soon be manageable - thank you, thank you, thank you. I am aware of addiction issues and won't let that happen - but in the meantime, thank you!
4. Now here is the big one - given that I made the right choice to move to this retirement community, there is no longer any reason to keep my very precious, sweet little cottage in Pacific Grove. At Christmas I decided to sell it and planned to go down and spend the month of February getting it ready for the market. Instead, the night before my flight, I was rushed to that emergency surgery. So what to do? My tenants had moved out, painters and floor refinishers were lined up, I was ready to go - just unable to get there.
If you had told me that I would allow my sweet house to go on the market without one more visit, I would have laughed. Utterly impossible. Actually, quite possible. Pain and fatigue have focused me on what is truly important. But I also have a secret weapon - I have the very best friend in the world who lives next door to me in Pacific Grove and happens to also be a top-rated realtor. Wonderful Robin has stepped in and handled everything for me. Via email and phone calls we are choosing paint colors, floor stains, and landscaping details. When the bug report and house inspection came back we analyzed what needed to be done. And given the cost of all the decisions we are making, I am really glad that one of us is not on drugs! Thank you, Robin. I still hope that I will get to visit before it sells but, if not, it will all be okay.
So I am on the mend; I firmly believe that I will walk again; and, am okay about letting go of my sweet little house. Truly onwards and upwards.
